The answer is YES! When invited, GO!
Many of us, especially millennials, maybe a few Gen Z (I feel like I fall between those two worlds), we love staying at home. We love sitting back to watching a movie, binging on Netflix, catching up on a few projects, or maybe just taking a nap.
When people say, “We’re going to go grab a drink. Wanna go?” You think, “I’d rather not.” Maybe they say, “Hey, we’re having a party at Tony’s house, do you want to go?” Our first reaction is, “No! I’d rather sit at home and do nothing than go to that party.” Maybe that’s not what we say out loud, but that’s what we say in our head…
Often when invited somewhere the first thing we begin to do is dig for an excuse. We start thinking of all the things that we previously said NO to. We think, maybe I could go back and say YES so that I don’t have to say yes to this NEW opportunity that just presented itself. We almost try to pick between the lesser of the two evils. When we get invited, we may even say yes in the moment, but then we immediately look at our calendar to see if there’s a conflict that we can use as a reason to get out of it. Many of us just naturally aren’t drawn to social settings. We’re drawn to saying NO to anything outside of our control.
We all know that there are introverts and extroverts. The quiet and reserved type and the outgoing type respectively. Being around people is either live-giving or life-sucking. It either is a breath of fresh air or it takes your breath away. Some of us LIVE for the moment that we get to go hang out with others…you’re an extrovert. You LOVE to spend time with others in social settings. But many of us would rather roll up in to a blanket like a burrito and fall asleep listening to rain on a window… don’t fall asleep now as nice as that sounds. Meyer’s Briggs states that 56% of people are introverts. That means more often that not, you do not want to network with other people. Greater than 50% of the population would rather NOT network.
Networking requires to some degree, getting over ourselves. Getting over our desire to stay in stay quiet, and keep to ourselves. Getting over the introvert-ness that you may be designed for. Networking requires that we go out and be at the place we were invited to. Can networking happen digitally, of course, we will cover that in the future. But networking asks of us to BE PRESENT. Networking asks us to GO.
When I started this, I made the simple statement, GO. Next time you are invited to go somewhere or be at an event, simply GO. As a parent and in my career of working with people, I’ve learned that some times people just need a little encouragement. They’re not doing anything wrong and they’re not particularly lazy, they just need a little motivation to get going. Well, this is my encouragement to you. Take this as your sign to get going!
Awhile back I was invited by a broker realtor to an event he was holding. It was an appreciation event for coworkers and employees, and those that he had the opportunity to represent either as a buyer’s agent or seller’s agent. I don’t work for him, I’ve never bought a house with him, and I’ve never sold house through him or anyone in his office. Frankly, I didn’t belong at the event because I did not fit the descriptions of anyone there. But guess what? He invited me. This event was held at the local activity center in our town. When I say activity center, I mean a local indoor water park. Do I love swimming with people I don’t know? Of course not. My wife and kids were out of town. Did I want to go hang out with dozens of kids? Of course not. But what did I say throughout the last few minutes? When invited, GO. I opted to attend the event and see what I could make of it. Also, I weighed the opportunity. I looked at who was putting the event on and who could possibly be there. But we’ll also cover that in future content.
Every invite is an opportunity to network. I’ll go more in depth in the future on what happened at this event and the opportunities I had as a result of going, but know this now, nothing would have happened if I just stayed home. Nothing would have happened if I just said “thanks for the invite” and kept on about my day. Guess what, one other detail, he invited me just hours before it started. Never let a tight time frame be an excuse for not attending a networking opportunity.
You may be sitting there saying, but no one ever invites me anywhere? Well, that’s about to change. As you grow and develop your networking skill, and become a great networker, your presence will be more in demand. When you focus on adding value to others, others will want you to be around more often.
Let’s connect with others authentically, grow our network, and add value to people.
Get ready to get invited, and get ready to go.
David Urzi 